After an encounter with a coworker or family member have you ever resorted to silence while thinking, “That person WANTED to hurt my feelings!” Or maybe someone has made a comment that made your blood boil and set you fuming with rage. How did you handle difficult situations? Want to know an efficient way to resolve these conflicts?



The group of Patterson, Grenny, McMilan, and Switzler spells out an amazing method for handling such Crucial Confrontations. Patterson et al argue that poor confrontations happen all the time – but they do not have to be that way. And in case you’re pessimistic, their methodologies are based on over twenty years of research and first-hand experience with the world’s best confrontation and conversation holders.

Their methods boil down to a few key steps:

Work on Me First:
Figure out if the conversation is worth having, and if so, ask yourself, “Why would a reasonable person have said or done what he did?” You may start to understand the other person’s point of view a little better.

Confront with Safety:
The most CRUCIAL part of the process. People can’t be honest and open to change unless they feel safe – maintain a feeling of comfort throughout the confrontation and you’ll be halfway to success.

Stay Focused and Flexible:
Throughout a confrontation, the other person may bring up other issues or concerns. Be ready to field these, and, if necessary, to table current issues to discuss the new one. However, don’t forget the original problem.

Move to Action
Finally, there can be no change without a plan to monitor accountability. Provide clear and concise ways to follow up.

Learn to successfully handle crucial confrontations and you’ll be on your way to better relationships and business success! (For more info, check out the group’s website for some informative materials, including video demonstrations! — CrucialConfrontations.com)

When Americans are asked what their greatest fears entail, public speaking consistently beats out death. Think about that…more people are afraid of talking in front of people than passing from this mortal coil. Yet research shows a direct correlation between income and the amount of presentations a person gives. Overcoming the fear of public speaking and becoming adept at it has a definite financial advantage.



Carmine Gallo’s “10 Simple Secrets of the World’s Greatest Business Communicators” seeks to provide straightforward tips on how to improve everything from your delivery style to nutrition tips. (Yes, even nutrition tips.)

Analyzing the presentation styles of current business rock stars like Apple’s Steve Jobs and Oracle’s Larry Ellison, Gallo points to the importance of using passion and vision to immediately hook audiences. He also advises readers to generously sprinkle in interesting stories as a way to hold an audience’s attention throughout. This dovetails nicely with what Daniel Pink mentions in “A Whole New Mind.”

While the book’s advice is very straightforward, you should read it for the exercises at the end of each chapter. It’s rare for a business book to be an interactive experience - by having to brainstorm and apply the lessons of each chapter you can build a basic presentation skill set and be miles ahead of your peers. Gallo even provides references on his website to some of the world’s best presenters which does wonders by letting you observe a sensei in battle.

One topic I wish the author would have explored in a little more detail is how some of these superstar speakers overcome and deal with their nervousness. Gallo does recommend preparation as the best panacea but I have an upcoming presentation to a tough audience and no matter how hard I’ve worked on it, I still feel a twinge of anxiety every time I think about it.

Gallo finishes out with plenty of encouragement and the idea that a good presenter can be molded over time.

“10 Simple Secrets of the World’s Greatest Business Communicators” is a great book for anyone looking to develop or further hone the all important skill of presenting. If careers can be made in a moment, make sure you are prepared to present your case convincingly.

This question has been pondered by those who aspire to be good leaders and it may take some soul searching to find the answer. Do you have the qualities to lead? Do you have the understanding of what it takes to be a leader? Do you know how to move from “good” to “great”?

The truth is that many leadership books act as though there is a static set of leadership characteristics in order to be able to lead. As Robert Goffee and Gareth Jones point out in their book “Why Should Anyone Be Led by You?: What It Takes To Be An Authentic Leader”, this is false. They dispute that “books on leadership persistently try to find a recipe for leadership…..in our view there are no universal leadership characteristics.” What? No universal leadership characteristics? I thought there are 5 ‘must have’ leadership characteristics? We need an easy answer. If there isn’t one, then how do I become a leader?

It’s simple. Be more like yourself, not others.

Goffee and Jones claim that “those aspiring to leadership need to discover what it is about themselves that they can mobilize in a leadership context. They need to identify and deploy their own personal leadership assets.”



Uh oh. Looks like there isn’t a quick fix to leadership. The process will require some deep soul searching so that you can discover your strengths and weaknesses and locate your ‘authentic’ self.

How do you do this? Goeffe and Jones list 3 axioms about leadership that must be understood:

• Leadership is situational. You are always influenced by the situation; therefore you have to have situational sensing to succeed.
• Leadership is non-hierarchal. There is too much focus on the top. Just because you are a CEO/Director/Manager doesn’t mean you are a leader. Hierarchy by itself is not sufficient enough to become a leader.
• Leadership is relational. You cannot lead without followers. Relationships need to be built by both parties – the leader and the follower.

Once these three axioms are internalized you can start down the path towards authentic leadership. Goeffe and Jones dive into the details of building your leadership skills throughout the book. If you implement the advice and wisdom of the authors you will no longer be asking the question ‘why should anyone be led by me?’. Instead you’ll be asking ‘who wants to be led by me?’

Check out more about “Why Should Anyone Be Led by You?” at Harvard Business School’s Working Knowledge website.

Change is hard to implement in organizations. People revolt against change. They want familiarity. They want the ‘old’ and don’t care what the ‘new’ is. This is the reality that organizations must face, but a reality which many ignore. All is not lost though; you can get change to stick. Richard Reale lays out the principles that make it happen in his book, “Making Change Stick: Twelve Principles for Transforming Organizations”.



Richard has over 20 years of research which shows why programs fail and why changes refuse to stick. This book is the culmination of his studies. Richard provides an easy to read manual on getting change to stick. He focuses on the ‘soft’ side of change – people, emotions, communication, and leading to name a few. Each chapter ends with a bulleted section titled Putting the Principles to Practice. This is where the nuggets of wisdom are found. A key section was titled ‘Involve and Be Involved,’ which says that you shouldn’t make changes and assume that everyone will follow. That is a sure way to failure. Instead, do as Richard says:

• Be approachable. Be authentic. Think ‘we’.
• Talk personally to individuals as well as groups
• Be open to input from everyone. Ask opinions and solicit ideas. Listen intently.
• Identify yourself with the change.

Check out the Postivie Impact Associates, Inc. website for more information regarding Richard’s work.

“Rule #1″, by Phil Town is a great introduction to value investing for the beginning to intermediate investor who is interested in a do-it-yourself approach. Rule #1 is aimed at investors who would have the time (and interest) to research their own stocks. The author describes an approach that combines Peter Lynch’s “buy what you know” principle with Warren Buffett’s and Ben Graham’s value investing approach.



Rule #1 explains how to identify quality companies in industries/areas you are most familiar with to identify target companies to research in more detail. Once you have identified a target list of companies, the author provides a step-by-step approach for evaluating the company’s growth potential and calculating the fair value estimate for the stock. Once you have calculated a stock’s fair price, simply wait for the opportunity to buy it for 50-cents on the dollar, to provide a sufficient safety cushion.

The steps help readers identify the fair value estimate for a stock, and then you can determine if the current asking price (i.e. stock quote) is a good deal or a bad deal.

Pros: Good intro to value investing. Provides more detailed step-by-step explanation than some of the other value investing books out there.

Cons: The author discusses buying and selling stock when the institutional investors do so in order to minimize risk. However, this approach causes investors to incur brokerage commission fees, which can add up over time.

Recommendation: Overall, Rule #1 is a great read for the do-it-yourself investor and a good introduction to value investing.

I bought this book after hearing Shel speak in one of Dan Janal’s Great Teleseminars. He came off as extremely knowledgeable, very down to earth, and hype-free. So is the book - I was not disappointed.

In my opinion, this is a “friendly” textbook on marketing ALL small businesses, consultants, etc. should read, and certainly applicable to big biz as well. It answered questions I never knew I had. There was information I could use IMMEDIATELY! For example, I went back and made minor yet significant edits to my (very few) Press Releases right away.



Let’s step back for a few minutes, I know very little about marketing despite having run my own business for 15+ years. I never paid attention to marketing, sales, or much of anything but my core competencies - what I was getting paid for as a consultant. Yeah, I’ve been “lucky,” but don’t want to count on luck anymore. Besides, I’ve suddenly decided I’m interested in marketing - it’s sooooo scientific. I’m serious - it’s all trial and error, truly scientific principles and methods. But there are some basic principles I lacked, and this book taught those well.

I understood some advanced marketing issues and techniques very well, as I’ve been studying marketing the last few months out of interest and curiosity, but I lacked most basics. It’s like understanding advanced calculus and topology, but not being able to add and subtract reliably. This book taught those basics. I should have read it 15 years ago, had it been published then! I still lack experience in most marketing areas, but now at least I have a “clue.”

In my first pass I read the topics that interested me with extreme interest. For example, I have, or thought I had, zero use for “Yellow Pages” ads as just one example. I was wrong. I’ve read this book cover to cover a few times and keep getting more value - and actionable information. It’s been on my nightstand now for months and I often read a random section before retiring at night.

If there is a downside, it’s that the Internet section is somewhat out of date. That is no surprise as the Internet is evolving rapidly and the book is copyright 2000, but I still think it would be the perfect primer for the uninitiated. Hey, I’m a 25 year Internet veteran and I learned things!

I’ve read (and reviewed here on TheTedRap.com) quite a few great books in the past year or so. This is one of the best! You can purchase it directly from Shel’s website.

I’ve just got Shel’s latest book, Principled Profit, and it’s on my reading short list. You may also want to check out Shel’s Good Business blog.

Bottom line: Grassroots Marketing, highly recommended.

- Ted Demopoulos, September 2006

BizBookTalk reviewed Ted’s book Blogging For Business recently and he expressed interest in contributing some reviews. Therefore, I introduce to you Ted Demopoulos:

Greetings from Ted Demopoulos

I’m excited to be reviewing business books for Biz Book Talk! I’m passionate about business books, and sometimes wish I could just read all day. I almost always read myself to sleep, and often wake up on a coach with a book on my chest and the lights on in the morning.

A little about myself: I’ve been on the Internet seemingly forever, way before I ever heard the term “Internet.” I consult on new media — primarily blogs and podcasts, and information security. An odd combo some would say, but hey, it’s all about information. I also blog at bloggingforbusinessbook.com and TheTedRap.com, and am the co-author of Blogging For Business: Everything You Need to Know and Why You Should Care and author of What No One Ever Tells You About Blogging and Podcasting: Real-Life Advice from 101 People Who Successfully Leverage the Power of the Blogosphere, available for pre-order now and on the shelves very soon.

Yup, I love biz books so much I figured I had to write a couple . . .